Why aren't you a Trump supporter?
Last Updated: 22.06.2025 03:24

I can count
I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”
I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”
I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened
I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink
I have complete contempt for traitorism
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I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality
I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center
I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity
I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight
I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”
I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”
It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms
authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday
I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”
I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP
EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that
I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes
After 70 years of the crappiest computers ever made, why does IBM exist?
I have complete contempt for fakery
I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee
I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”
What fiber optic setup would you recommend for a small business network?
Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?
When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP
I actually pay taxes
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I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones
I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t
I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes
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It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter
I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”
I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions
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I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane
I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”
I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”
Are there any examples of outdated values in the Bible?
I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup
Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:
I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet
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A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y
I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.
I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light
I have an acute aversion to scumbags
I took the same Oath and took it seriously
I don’t buy bullshit
I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”
I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t
I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t
I know who the president of Turkey really is
I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard
If someone works for me, I actually pay them
I don’t watch or listen to advertising
I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write
I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is
When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability
I have a reading level above third grade
I don’t cotton to rapists
Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.
I can read
I see through liars
I understand how hurricane paths work